Chapter 41 April 1813: A Toy Soldier

Jean replied at once, but he only said: "Ill send the Emperor an answer soon. The world will want to read it too, so I cant write it in a hurry."

At the same time I had a letter from Oscar. "A French woman called Madamoiselle Georgina has come to Stockholm," he wrote. "Shes acting in a play at the royal theater. Papa invited her to dinner at the castle. He discussing memories of Paris with her all the evening. The Queen was very angry. So was Miss Koskull. In fact Miss Koskull was so jealous that she got ill. She stayed in bed for a week! Usually Papa looks sad and serious. He works too hard and he gets very tired. But that night he and Mademoiselle Georgina were laughing gaily together."

I laughed, and I cried a little. I wanted to got to bed for a week, like Miss Koskull. She isnt the only jealous woman.

Count Rosen also had news from Sweden. "My friends cant write openly," he said. "because French secret police read our letters. But I know what they mean. Russia and Britain have invited our Crown Prince to plan their war against France. And Austria will join them; thats almost certain."

He looked at me proudly and added: "Sweden couldnt have a better Crown Prince. Hell make our country great again."

"Yes," I said. "Sweden will win the worlds respect if she helps to make Europe free. Shell be a great country in the future, but her kings will not make wars. Theyll encourage art and science. Theyll write music and poetry. Arent you glad that Prince Oscar can write music?"

Rosen gave a curious look. "Your Royal Highness is the strangest woman that Ive ever met." he said.

I gave the Emperor Jeans message. Today, at last, the full answer came. I couldnt open it, of course, but Count Brahe sent me a copy. "Were also sending copies to all Swedish newspapers," he said.

It was a very strong letter. "The people of Europe want to live in peace," it said. "They wont have any peace till they have defeated you. Sweden will help them to do that. Then France too can live in peace. Every French village has lost its best sons in your wars. What has France gained in return? It went on like that. And I had to take it to Napoleon myself!"

At five oclock count Rosen and I arrived at the Tuilleries. Napoleon was ready for us in his big study. Caulaincourt was with him. So was Talleyrand.

He opened the letter and read it quickly. I was watching his face, but it didnt change at all. Then suddenly he looked up at me and said fiercely: "Youre beautifully dressed today, madame. Are you feeling gay because your husband has decided to fight his own homeland? How dare you wear flowers on your dress when you bring a letter like this one?"

"Your majesty," I said, "you asked me to write to my husband and to bring you his answer. Ive done that. Ive read a copy of the letter; so I know that I shall never see you again. Im wearing the flowers because I want you to have a happy memory of this moment. May I say goodbye now, Your Majesty, for the last time?"

There was a silence. Caulaincourt stared in surprise. Even Talleyrands eyes opened wider. They expected the Emperor to scream like a madame. Instead he said quietly: "Please wait here, gentlemen. I wish to speak to Her Royal Highness alone."

We went into his small study, and he shut the door behind us. There were some toy soldiers on the floor. "Do they belong to the King of Rome?" I asked.

"Yes--- and no," he said. "I use them when I plan my battles. And when my son comes in here, he plays with them." He paused and stared into my face. "He should have been our son, Desiree. Weve been friends for a very long time. We cant really say goodbye for ever, can we?"

"Why not, Your Majesty?"

"Why not? Have you forgotten those days in Marseilles? Have you forgotten that seat under the apple trees in your garden? We were young together, Desiree. Those days are a happy memory, and they always will be. Ive never been really happy since then."

He had been looking out of the window. Now he turned and looked straight at me. "Why did I come to your house that night, when I got back from Moscow? Ill tell you the reason. I was cold and tired and hungry. I needed you."

"Thats not true, Your Majesty," I said. Did he have to lie to me, even when we were saying goodbye? "You didnt come to Desiree Clary. You came to the Crown Princess of Sweden, because you wanted her husband to fight for you."

He shook his head. It was getting dark, and I could only just see his face. "I wanted to see you. Only you. But I was so tired that I talked stupidly. I talked about Bernadotte when I meant to talk about Marseilles."

About Bernadotte? Yes. Napoleon is still terribly jealous. He went on: "I wonder what lady friends your husband has in Stockholm now."

"I can tell you the name of one." I said. "Your own friend, Mademoiselle Georgina, was with him while you were in Moscow."

"My God! Little Georgina, the theater girl? Has she gone to him?" There was a short silence. Then he said: "You know that the Tsar has offered your husband a Russian princess. Do you know that he has also offered him the throne of France?"

The throne of France! "He would never accept it," I said. The idea made me angry, so I added: "May I go now, Your Majesty?"

He came close to me. Then he took my hand and held it against his lips. "I ought to send you out of France, Desiree, but I still love you too much. Im jealous of your Bernadotte. Im even jealous of that fair-haired Swede who goes around with you."

"Im glad youve shaved today, Your Majesty." I said as I drew my hand away from his lips. Then I walked quickly to the door.

"Desiree!" he called softly.

But I was already out of the room.

After dinner this evening a servant came from the palace. He brought a parcel: a present for the Crown Prince of Sweden. Inside it there was a little French toy soldier.